With only about two weeks left to the new school year, there are between 10 and 15 high school girls who still have nowhere to go. (Contrary to popular belief that there are over 30 without a place). Many readers have asked us what the status is with these girls and what has been done this far by community activists. On Friday, TLS spoke with several Askonim involved who said that they are working around the clock with the school principals and Menahelim to resolve the matter as quickly as possible-and "Baruch Hashem, there is progress". Last year, the Roshei Hayeshiva Shlita prevented all girl's schools from opening until all students were settled. We will keep you updated with any further developments.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Up To Fifteen High School Girls Remain Without A School
With only about two weeks left to the new school year, there are between 10 and 15 high school girls who still have nowhere to go. (Contrary to popular belief that there are over 30 without a place). Many readers have asked us what the status is with these girls and what has been done this far by community activists. On Friday, TLS spoke with several Askonim involved who said that they are working around the clock with the school principals and Menahelim to resolve the matter as quickly as possible-and "Baruch Hashem, there is progress". Last year, the Roshei Hayeshiva Shlita prevented all girl's schools from opening until all students were settled. We will keep you updated with any further developments.
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223 comments:
1 – 200 of 223 Newer› Newest»My daughter is not in school yet officialy.but in all fairness it is probably because my wife doesn't dress tznius. I do business without wearing a yarmulke.go to atlantic city whenever I get achance. Have been taken to a din torah for stealing money supposedly. And. Oh I'm sorry I mixed myself up with someone else their daughter got into high school no problem never mind
Our daughter is not in high school yet. I was very insulted until iwas told who didn't get in all the previous years and honestly I am now very proud to be included in such a chashuve group truly from lakewoods finest.
It seems that many people that don't get in are the ones that are too ashamed to push and beg.you can't be too proud to beg in this case. Your daughters education is too important. How will she be able to go to a good seminary and become an o.t so she can support her learning husband until she has 4 kids and he then has to scramble to find a job.
Its so amazing. Every year the same parents who do nothing to help support the schools , complain about the "terrible Reshoim " who actually did something and opened up schools. Most of these people used their own money and spent thousands of hours to start schools that these " complainer" parents send their kids to.
What do you expect when the High Schools in Lakewood can't even collect 4000 a year from the same parents who send their kids to seminary at 20k a pop and to summer camp for 3k or more. If schools got half decent tuitions , most of these problems would go away. There would be money for new classes , for tutors and social workers for special needs and weaker kids etc etc. Right now nobody in town cares to support our own mosdos so of course the schools are not going to undertake more classes , weaker kids etc that are big money drainers on their already bankrupt budgets. Put your money where your mouth is and arrange proper funding for each school and I guarantee you that they will be much more tolerant in their acceptance policies and expansion plans
The problem is that Lakewood has too many well meaning so called "askanim " . In NY nobody helps you so people are realistic and apply to schools that they know have room and are appropriate for them . In lakewood ,parents are unrealistic and akshonim ,becuse they know that when their kids dont get into the school that they applied to ,all the "askanim " will try to help them by calling every choshuveh person in the world to pressure the mosdos to take them . Belive me ,if all these parents were left on their own ,then 90% of these kids would eventually apply to the schools that have room ,like in NY . Of course there are always going to be a handful of problem cases that nobody really wants ( not unexpected in a town of ten thousand students ) and by and large those problemd get resolved before school starts . But these cases are a small fraction of the total numbers which are just parents being stubborn .
I for one have always supported every school. My business gave away tens of thousands a year to show support. Every tea every auction I gave. And now when it was time to get mt daughter into a school I need to beg? No one asked you to open a school. You run it like a business and want to look exclusive to stay in business. This is not how yidden should act. The same way I treated those that asked for favors I expected to be treated in kind. It was rude and I have been awakened to reality. No more mr nice guy here.
The schools are run like a business because the customers will put them out of business if they dont cater to the customers . Those schools that tried to take everybody in the past ,were quickly put out of business by the parents who stopped sending their kids . Its the parents fault ,not the schools fault . Do you really expect every school to take problem kids voluntarily ,knowing that within 2 years they will probably have no normal applicants ? This has happened several times in Lakewood . So get the parents to change their tune and then talk .
It took almost 2 months for this topic to hit the airways.
Welcome to the wonderfull torah town of Lakewood.
The High school tuitions in Lakewood are crazy low . There is no way that the schools will be able to survive long term ,paying their teachers almost double elementary school standards and charging tuitions just a little more than elementary schools . Out of town High schools charge about 3 times as much
First of all dont blame the schools . They are just dancing to the tune of the parents . You know good and well that as soon as a school starts taking certain kinds of kids ,then next years enrollment drops in half . The schools dont have a problem . The parents are at fault . I know cases where the same parents who screamed Reshoim at school administrators for not taking more kids ,once they found out a certain problem kid was going to be in their childs class , went ballistic and threatened to turn over the world. You cant expect the schools to commit suicide if the attitude of the vast majority of Lakewood parents is like that
Are you all trying to say that if a child is not a straight A student but in general she is a nice Bas Yisroel (no problems in class, dresses tznias, in general a nice girl, just not a strong academic girl) she should not have a place to go to school?
10 or 15 out of almost 500 is not such a big number .Im sure that most of them will get resolved before school starts .
I heard this number was much bigger a few weeks ago but most of those that did not have a school were those that decided for one reason or another ,to only apply to one school .With another hundred additional kids going into high school every year , everybody with half a brain knows that the older schools will be full and you have to apply to a newer school . Be thankful that there are newer schools opening up . It is a pretty big chutzpah for people to self inflict this on their daughters by only applyinf to the oldest schools and then crying when those schools obviously have no room .If you want to go to older established schools ,move out of Lakewood . In lakewood ,with the yearly growth ,be thankful that there always new schools out there for you . I am sick and tired of hearing about these numbers of girls without schools ,when everybody knows that these kids could have gotten in to some newer school ,had their parents not been so stubborn . Imagine if every parent only applied to Yeshiva Ketana or Talmud Torah and when they get rejected ,they go around saying that the administrators are Reshoim because their kids are out of school .Of course had they applied to the Cheder or some of the newer Chadorim they would have gotten in and everybody knows that . For some reason ,with High school girls ,many people try to play that game and then scream and cry .
know of several parents ,who admitted that School A... or B would have taken them had they applied .But they only wanted the schools that didnt want them. Now they are crying to get into the ones they didnt apply to but of course its too late . The schools have deadlines and if you play poker with your kids future ,then sometimes you lose .
Charge more for tuition I would pay it. But don't tell me after living in lakewood for thirty years and because I now have my first girl going to high school that I should arrange funding. What achutzpah. If I have a heart attack does a hospital complain to me that I should fund them before I can be treated. Stop complaining. Accept every jewish child. Charge tuition that makes sense. Finished.
to 11:01 pm
Nobody here said that . Every fine nice Bas Yisroel described by yiu deserves to get in . It is just your responsibility ( among the rest of the Klal ) to see to it that there are enough seats in the schools . With the Lakewood frum school poulation doubling every few years ,its almost impossible to keep up without big dollars .
An odom chosuv once said . The biggest maile in this Shiduuch is that they want me . apply to a school that wants you ,and dont run after those that are full or just dont want you . That will solve 98% of the problems
i delighted to see the over whelming support for our mosdos thank you so muche and keep it up.
The schools cant charge tuition that makes sense . The are not even able to collect the crazy low tuitions they are charging now from most people . Lakewood is unique that almost everybody has a large family and cant afford to pay what it costs.
To the one that said it is the parents fault. I was told by one menahel that he had parents that are making him crazy that they won't send their daughter unless they don't accept certain families. They ask to see the enrollment list first. And it is the parents fault? You give in to these soinim and the good people suffer.and all parents are to blame?you all meed to take a course in mentchlechkeit. If the rabbonim of this town had any power they would enact rules on how each school must treat each parent that comes to enroll. Just note that the man who started this whole trend od mistreating parents is now out of a job. Treat everyone nice only good can come of it
Did anyone see the toys for thoght ad in the lakewood weekly? Is this what it is talking about?funny
I was at the Asifa that motzei Shabbos when the VAAD & Mashgiach Guaranteed that no girl would be left out of school if they applied to 3 HS. Atleast 1 had to be from the newer schools.
1. My daughter did apply to 3 (yes three) HS.
2. We had to pay 3 application FEES (Don't worry the checks were cashed).
3. my daughter had to take 3 exams.
I did everything that the VAAD & mashgiach told us to do, and still my daughter has not as of yet received an acceptance letter.
All I get when I call the VAAD is
THEY ARE WORKING ON IT. WE CAN'T TELL THE SCHOOLS WHAT TO DO.
Last but not far from least, I HOPE SCHOOLS ARE NOT GOING TO OPEN UNTILL ALL GIRLS ARE ACCEPTED TO SCHOOL.
Some of these comments are just laughable . One commentor states that its not parents responsibility to make new schools ,its the Community responsibility . Please wake up .There is no community organization in Lakewood . By Chasidim the the community takes responsibility for these things . In Lakewood ,the parents are the Community ,because nobody has taken responsibility for opening schools . Since its your child YOU have to educate him or her .Be thankful that there are a few "meshugaim " who spent their hard earned personal money to make scchools that have room for 95% of the kids .
To the one who asked why every school doesnt take a few more kids and split them into smaller classes .
Have you ever heard of money ? It costs a lot of money to pay High School teachers to teach another class . It also costs a lot of money to build the classroom space for those extra classes . Have you offered to foot the bill ? The Administrators cannot schnorr anymore because nobody out there is giving money . even those who give money ,only give it to Boys yeshivas where they think they are doing 'Hachzokas Hatorah " . The same gvir who will give a 1000 donation to a new Boys Mesivta with 7 talmidim ,will give 36 dollars to a Girls high school with 300 students . Check your facts . I did .
Not every parent tzitturs because a non typical child gets put in their kids class. Talk to your child tell. Them to communicate with you. If you don't like the child tell them to stay away. My child has come to tell me that a choshive families son taught him avery bad word. I just told him to stay away. No reason to call the school or make a tumult. Communicate.
I have a sibling that comes from v nice family and he is a top rebbi in a top moisad and he didn't bother with the brand name TOP schools and went to Birnbaums school and is laughing at others who insisted on the Big names and are now stuck
It is the responsibility of a community of 50,000 plus frume yiden to collectively support a frum school systyem . The fact is that they are not . The goyim understand this responsibility by taxing us for the public schools . For some reason we do not do the same for our schools . You cant complain to the guy who made a school and made himself into a SCHNORRER ,why he is not schnorring more to expand his school to create more classes for your daughter . If he had 25 seats in the class and there were 10 empty seats ,then you can complain. But in most cases , the classes were designed for 25 seats and thre are 30 or more . So if he took your daughter ,them he would have to reject somebody else .
Yes I support the moisdos.they treat most people with respect and dignity when they need something from them and then spit in their face as soon as they don't need them anymore.how they sleep at night I don't know
to 11:28 pm
For every one like your sibling ,there are probably 10 who try to fight their way into schools and end up causing all these problems
For all those who hate the Moisdos .
Why dont you start a new Moisad ? according to you everybody who runs a Moisad makes a lot of money and gets a lot of Kovid . There is a terrific demand for Mosdos in Lakewood . It should be a great business . Go open one up tomorrow and become rich .
I think all the peopke that didn't get in are on this blog. So they didn't get in because they have internet. But then again it seems that there are a few menahalim on here too so I guess its a wash on that point
Perhaps there are 15 girls who have not yet been placed, but many more have not received an answer. The vaad might know where they're going, but until all of the negotiations are complete, many will not hear a word from any school. I was told that my daughter is a "bargaining chip", & cannot be placed in a school officially until all of the other girls are accepted. Its sort of like choosing sides for a sports team.
I am a parent who pays full tuition in all of my childrens elementary schools, & give donations besides. I am fully supportive of all of the schools my children attend.
The "terrible Reshoim who actually did something and opened up schools", using "their own money" (how many independantly wealthy people are there in this town?), actually pander to the "complainer" parents. They are actively seeking students who would:
a) rather be in a different school, but can't get in
b) drive them nuts about who else they are accepting, threatening to pull out if the school accepts someone they don't like
This makes them seem exclusive, which leads to more applicants.
Why not cater to people who actually pay tuition? WHy not engender good feelings toward you school so that you get more donations? Why narrow your pool of donors by excluding people & saying "no" in a nasty & degrading way?
L'toeles Harabim: Don't kid yourselves. Girls from very chashuva homes, families who have been in Lakewood for many years, have not been accepted to any high school. IT COULD BE YOU.
I heard from a reliable source that many girls were told that a perticular school or 2 would accept them if they apply ,but they still chose not to . Im sure that there are aome that still dont have anywhere to go but the majority could have gone somewhere.
I know. A wonderful family that had their daughters destroyed by lakewood girls schools and have a girl going in now that is being rejected and they are moving. They called the high school in their new town were told the costs and were sent an enrollment form. No games no pull no begging. Did you expect these hard working cessed doing wonderful ppeople to open agirls school?they got up and moved after living here for twenty years and it is our loss. These are the finest people atown could ask for. Baalei chessed baalei tzedakah pleasant normal people. And noew another town will have them.
Shame on the high schools for sacrificing the dignity & future of 13 yr old girls for their own personal gain. Shame on those who stand by & do nothing. Child sacrifice is Avoda Zorah. Persecuting "unwanted" children is what christians do. Start following your own religion. Review what the Torah says about chinuch. Maybe you will have more hatzlocha with your school.
There are a few girls who are not accepted yet not because:
their parents
their lack of money
their lack of pull or yichus
But because they are not fit to be part of a frum school because of the way they act and dress and the schools should NOT accept them PERIOD
I know and that is a fact
Period
Do not blame anyone but the girls themselves and Parents- face the facts and send them out of town where they will accept them as is and hopefully shape them up
I am at a loss to understand something .
If a High school has 25 desks in a class and they are all full why is that called persecution if they state they have no more room ? And in most cases they have already added desks till 30 or more . If taking your daughter just means ,rejecting somebody elses instead because there is room for only 1,why is that called persecution ? Please explain
I spoke to rabbonim and mechanchim about opening a new school. That would automatically accept all the girls from a large elementary school. I was told very succinctly that the other schools would tkae me to a din torah for hasogos gvul.
ypu are so right
There are many cases where kids who need space and are more with it ,would have done well in a more relaxed ,liberal out of town environment . Instead the Askanim forced them into Lakewood schools thar were designed to be strict and very frum ,and the kids went off the derech . Parents ,be realistic and do what is good for your kids ,not what is good for you families Kovod . You might regret it one day Ch"v
Mr. Someone in the Know: SOme of the girls who were not accepted this year or in previous years are from the wealthiest families in this town. They are perfectly tznius & some have yichus as well. (Unless you mean being the niece of a high school administrator) Your head would spin if you heard some of their names.
They were left out because a) they do not have a sibling who previously went to high school &
b) they are not straight A students
The proof is that some less-than-tznius girls, who have siblings in hs already, were accepted. Some straight A students, who come from very questionable families, were accepted.
You're obviously not that much "in the know."
Their crimes
11:59 pm
You are full of baloney
I personally know some of the people involved with running some of the high schools and they were begging people to open up new schools because there was too much demand for to little supply . There were new schools opened up last year and 3 years ago and nobody took anybody to Din Torah . They were all encouraged and given Chizuk by everybody
To someone in know,
I will never forgive you for what you just wrote. Not only is it a lie, but a hurtfull one at that.
To 11:56 p.m.: It is called "persecution" because the schools do not even the acknowledge the existence of these girls by sending them a rejection letter! The parents keep checking their mailboxes, hoping their acceptance letter was lost in the mail. It is called "persecution" because they have no sympathy for their fellow yidden. They treat girls like heads of cattle, bargaining with the vaad for how many "extras" they have to take.
Dear mr in the know. My daughter is not officially in a school and I was told by someone really in the know that it is because the schools are waiting till the end to accept her so they will not need to accept too many of the undesirable ones. She dresses more tznius than her own teachers. Has a higher iq than me or you and has never said a bad word about anyone. Should she also go out of town to shape up?she was born here. Were you? Maybe if people like you -that are in the know would leave then we could all live bshalom ubracha without the stigma of all the sinas chinom that you promote. Get in the know and get out of town yourself
I am not someone in the know
He did not write that every kid that is out is a tznius problem . He just wrote that there are SOME kids who should not go to local schools ,and he is right . Out of 450 or 500 it is not a surprise that a small amount like 5 or 10 do not fit in to any of the schools . He was not necessarily ta;lking about YOUR DAUGHTER . Why are you jumping all over him for his comment ?
Someone in the Know should shape himself up. I hope that all of your children are perfect in every way, frumkeit & academically. I hope that you always get in to every school you apply to. You don't seem like you could possibly handle imperfect children.
Dear mr in the know. I know who you are and I know what you look at online and I think you better look out because a lot of people already figured out who you are so maybe it is time for you to leave and shape up
Just saw the touys for thought ad. Very funny
to 12:07 am
I think it is you (among the rest of the community ) who treat girls like heads of cattle . You and everybody else knows that the existing schools are full and yet you ( as part of the community ) do not do anything to create more schools . If a school is full beyond capacity ,what is wrong with them bargaining with the Vaad ,not to have to take more kids than they can handle .
to: August 22, 2009 11:53 PM.
Tell me know it all . Whats worse a parent who blogs on the internet or a child who you feel doesnt dress appropriately?
I saw the ad too. Did he have trouble getting his kids in school?
I have a very simple solution to this . Why dont all the parents who think the Mosdois are Reshoim ,get together and open up 1 High School that will accept everybody. Then we will have no more problems . You might even become very rich in the process ,because I am sure all the school owners are millionaires from all the tuitions they collect .
I have a daughter going in to high school for the 2010 - 2011 school year (next year). Trust me, I'm not sending her to school in Lakewood. She's not a piece of cattle to be decided upon by some vaad. I'll send her 'out of town' where she'll be respected.
I know somebody who wanted to open a school until he went to the accountants who do the existing schools books and saw that he would lose a few hundred thousand a year . And that was before shnorring for a building .
To yated
Great idea . If more people did that we would have less problems with space
What is wrong with bby? I am aparent there and I am generally happy
who ever said something is wrong with bby ? why do you have a complex ?
"I have a daughter going in to high school for the 2010 - 2011 school year (next year). Trust me, I'm not sending her to school in Lakewood. She's not a piece of cattle to be decided upon by some vaad. I'll send her 'out of town' where she'll be respected."
Why dont you go out of town too?
To yated:
Obviously you have a problematic daughter as 99 percent of the girls do not go to the vaad. The vaad was put in place by the mashgiach and some caring askanim who saw a need for this. By you threatening to go out of town for high school, you are actually making it easier for the vaad to place other girls. Sending a girl out of town has its own risks and I hope that you have calculated that into your decision.
Parents need to stop complaining about tuition and realize it is the number one priority to pay and tuitions must be raised accordingly for those that can pay. Those that can't need to show how they spend their money. Do you have a cleaning lady? Fancy car? Camp? Then pay up. The schools need to treat everyone with honesty and in a timely manner. send out acceptance letters or rejection letters if they have no room. The askanim need to butt out and get back to their jobs. Without them things could go a lot smoother. All menahalim need to be given a course in protocols for accepting kids into school. They should not be allowed to open until set guidelines are not accepted by everyone. Problem cases should be given over to a competent rav. The family should be told what is expected of them if they are to be admitted to school.everyone needs to be open and honest with one another. Is that too much to ask of. From a town that holds itself to a higher standard than others?please I beg of you all stop the sinas chinom and pettiness.there is too much at stake.
Lakewood used to be out of town. Oh how I miss it.
Anon 12:27
"What is wrong with bby?"
Lets face it. Some (not all) of the unaccepted are stuck-up, wannabee, keep-up with Jones's, that it doesn't pass for them to be in a school like BBY, etc. Not that there is anything wrong. Just, that unless it is the current hot school, they will not even apply.
Don't start yelling because like I said it is not the reason for all the unaccepted.
But maybe some of those parent's who will decide to stop watching their mailboxes for their acceptance letter from BYHS and just be willing to go to any school there might be less girls sitting out of school.
As for the others I don't know why they would be singled out from all the hundreds of girls accepted.
I think the only time a child should need to go out of town is if they are special needs or retarted child that can't be care for at home
To 12:35 am: I thought you said the Mashgiach has nothing to do with this! Who are these caring askanim, and why don't they care about me?? I am hoping and praying that I do not have to send my daughter out of town. So far I have no in-town options.
I think it is truly amazing that with 450 kids applying and such a shortage of schools , that are only 10 or 15 kids with no school.
I think it shows that Lakewood and its schools are very caring.
Out of 450 kids , statistics say that at least 20 percent or close to 100 should have issues and problems , and even with such a severe shortage of seats , most of these kids were placed voluntarily by the school administrators , who are all private schools. I think this shows that we are a truly great town.
Why don't the RoshYeshivas just pen up 1 school that will accept any girl from any elementary school ? That will solve the problem once and for all.
May we all find the yeshuos that we need. May we all recognize our own part in this horrible game of sinas chinam.
Get some sleep guys. A gutte voch to all.
No one has a right o tell anyone to leave town. Except the mexicans. They can leave. Except my cleaning lady she's really good. Oh and my gardener
I know of a family who two yrs ago couldn't get their daughter in hs. they screamed what reshaim the mosdos are. when askanim got involved they were told by one rosh hamosed that they told the parents of this girl that they will glady take her in with one t'nai-get rid of your dog! this family when screaming reshaim reshaim left out this detail. the bottom line is there may be 2 sides to the story.
Seriously, what's wrong with Bnos Bais Yaakov?
The Menaheles and adminstartion are caring people, Rav Shmuel Kaminetsky endorses it highly, what is the matter?
They recently bought a new building to allow further growth, why isn't Bnos the "in" place?
To bad a certain girls elementry school might not be opening this year......
I hope the askanim can save this school as well
I don't understand. We know that there are rules that if u have a television or internet you acnt get into school. There are other rules also like dresiing a certain way etc. It is obvious that with Lakewoods growth of recen years that there are going to be at least 5 or 10 per cent of the people that don't conform to the rules of the existing schools. So why does everybody expect that everybody will always get in to a school when we know that out of the thousand or so new kids ( between primary and 9th grade ) there have to be at least 20 to 30 that do not meet the criteria. Of course there are some that meet the criyteria and still will have a problem so don't jump all over me that your daughter is great and I said she is not. All I am asking is that it is obvious that every year there have to be some families out of the thousands that don't meet the criteria of the existing schools especially with the many non yeshiva people moving in every day. So how can we complain and say that everybody has to be accepted every year. Something has to give. Either the schools have to become more modern and relax their criteria or people have to send out of town , or more liberal modern schools have to be established.
good morning.i cant believe what a firestorm i woke up to.i am a parent in one of the above mentioned smaller schools and can tell you right now that my daughter was hounded and nit picked for the stupidest things.her shirts were too tight, she got loose ones.her hair was in tight braids ,she made them looser.her nails were manicured not polished but they look polished and on and on.she is a pretty girl k a h and we dont need a man looking her over constantly to be boidik every possible tznius infraction .that in itself is a bigger problem than a shirt that may be too tight.we taka need some normal people to step up and open a school
To 12:51 - if it were your daughter who did not get accepted - you would not be talking like that.
Yes, there are families with tznius & frumkeit issues who cannot get their children into schools. However, there are also some girls with tznius issues & from very problematic families who DID get their daughters in to school. They either have a sibling there already, or they are straight A students, which is what the schools are vying for.
Left out of this cheshbon are aome wonderful, tznius girls from long-time established Lakewood families who are not officially in a school yet! Families who pay full tuition & never cause any trouble in other schools. These girls do not have an older sibling already in high school & they do not have perfect grades.
Perhaps it is true that these girls will ultimately be placed in a school before the year starts, but they have been mistreated badly & those who need mechila should ask for it now in Elul. Yom Kipur Eino Mechaper.
Dear Lakewood Scoop: you only slept from 2:38 am to 6:14 am? YOU are the askon who works tirelessly for this community. Bet you could solve the high school crisis with one all-nighter! Hope you get a nap today.
Bloggers start your engines. This one might outdo the tznius childless letter comments. To the guy who thinks this is all people with dogs that dres not tznius not getting in-you need to meet mr in the know. He can tell you that many of the girls are not accepted yet. Because they have tznius issues and you can both go with your perverted minds to apsychologist and tell him that you think about little girls dressing not tznius. REBBONO SHEL OILAM THEY WEAR UNIFORMS THERE ARE RULES TELL THEM THE RULES NICELY AND I AM SURE THEY WILL LISTEN. If they don't then ask them kindly to find another school
If everybody seems to agree that there are always going to be some families that should not be accepted due to tznius and hashkofa etc iSsues , ( which is not surprising due to the growth of lakewood and the thousands of families involved ) , then thus issue will never get resolved.
In NY there are all kinds of high schools from coed to modern to plain frum to very frum to chasidish etc. Here in Lakewood all the schools ( so far as I know ) were opened to cater to a strictly very frum yeshivish clientele. So there is very little choice for the growing population that nmight not fit that criteria. While I feel bad for any girl without a school , we also can't force schools to change their original mission and start catering to a more liberal clientele.
Sounds like a problem that will only get a lot worse before it gets better.
My daughter came home hysterically crying that a male menahel told her she should watch what she eats because she is getting fat. I think we are all speaking of the same school right?if that is the alternate choice given to us what are we supposed to do?
A male menahel should not be interactin g with the girls I would say. Although these days I would worry about all of them.
why don't you all put your money where your mouth is. i know someone that is ready, able, and willing to start and run a new school in town. all he needs is money. let's see the donations. contact: *********************
I want to point out as some have that some girls were not accepted because their academic records werent' so great = but they are modest girls with good midos.
The schools must learn the alternate definition of tznius, modesty and should not be too elite to accept what they feel are "substandard" girls.
Why should agirl be accepted if she is not accademically superior. I applied to oros for that reason. I was told they only want smarter girls. Why should my daughter be dragged down with non studious girls? Should they be forced to accept retarded ones too?that is why we have schi let then go there
It seems that the mosdos arte being run by abunch of people that hoped one day to get rvenge on all the fancy people by not accepting their kids to school. Good for them. Everyone deserves a little comeuppance
9:51 I hope you don't impart your disgusting haskofos to your daughter. I hope those hashkofos die when you do ad meah veesrim
Kol ha'oskim b'sorchei tzibur be'emuna, hakadosh baruch hu yeshalem secharam.
Aval al eilu shelo nahagu b'chessed u'birachamim,
yesh din, v'yesh dayan. Umi shelo kevar ra'ah b'einav es hadin hakasheh al eilu shelo nahagu keshurah, kevar higia z'man kriat shema shel shacharit.
V'al habanot hachashuvot shelo asu meumah, v'al kol panim lo hitkabilu b'kavod, al eileh ani bochiya, anei anei yordah mayim.
Thank you mrs or mr academically superior. Iwas told that oros was not taking my daughter because she is not up to par with the other girls. Fine. But don't tell me you opened a school ltzorchei tzibbur. You opened it to compete with bais yakov and to have a business that will be successful. Don't hide under the guise of tzidkus. Its not nice to the true tzadikim of this town.
To 9:51 a.m, if you are serious, I want to tell you about a very hot place...
Now I can see how child molesters get away with the things they do. We sit back and let all these things happen under our noses
I want my daughter to learn all she can before dhe gets married. All the weaker girls should get a school designed for them. They won't go because they are afraid they won't get ashidduch. That is not my problem. Should my daughter have to suffer in her limud so a slow girl or a girl who is almost off the derech needs a place?let them go to a school made for them. There will be slow boys when it is time to get married I'm sure
Just turned on my computer and am amazed at wht I am reading. A menahel told atalmidah that she is fat? And he is still in charge? A school was set up for only the best girls and wants our support?people living here fo thirty years and are good frum people can't get into high schools they have been giving to all these years? It is elul do you all want to burn?cmon get it togehter people. I know personally that all the schools and menahalim do not get along and they all hate the vaad. The sinas chinom flowing freely these days in good ol lakewood
10:15,
We'll see how you talk when one of your kids comes up with an issue.
Secondly, halevay that there was a school in Lakewood for all the so called "b" grade girls, but there is not. And these so called "b" girls have many other talents and fine middos, which you of all people should learn from.
And you should know that in the past, schools for only the acedemically superior have failed, and HaShem does not look kindly upon them.
There is so much more to learn in life than your empty unholy study of ancient Hebrew writings. You should go to college for what you are looking to learn. Its not Torah, because its not chessed. Titain emes L'Yaakov, chessed l'avraham. One without the other is not Torah!
Your elitizm is disgusting. Be kind to the downtrodden, so the wheel of life shall not turn upon you.
Wow you all have very crooked hashkofos. Glad I left lakewood long ago. I live a happy non yeshivish life because of all of you people I just looked here because a friend called and said you gotta see what the retards are arguing about in lakewood. More girls will realize like I did what a waste of time your lifestyle has become. You are a bunch of hypocrites. I am now a sucessful businesswoman in manhattan and happier than I ever was under the lakewood taliban oppressors. You never showed me any love for my religion just negativity. I live a positive happy productive life now. I have come to realize that judaism is more than what is practiced in closed minded provincial lakewood. There is a whole world out there. You jerks helped me relize that. Ksiva vchsima tova
To 9:51-
You are a piece of work. I wouldn't want my daughter going to school with yours anywhere!
I applied to Oros because it was a new school and I was hoping a new school would be more accepting.
I guess I was wrong, but thank goodness, because I would not want to be with her at PTA.
this is Lakewood Ir Hatorah? the chofetz chaim states the reason for the continued galus is lack of shmiras halashon. not tznius not kosher not shmiras shabbos etc.... it is because of what comes out of our mouths. rabbosai, yes its true that the mashgiach promised that any girl who applied to 3 schools would be guaranteed to get in and that there are girls who did that and still they did not get in. its true that some girls are not up to the tznius standards of the schools. all this is true. SO WHAT? as bnei torah it is our responsibility to care for each and every one of them even if they aren't as yeshivish as *YOU* think they should be and sitting here commenting about them is worse than if you would be talking about it with your friend because here the whole world sees your massive chillul hashem. shame on all of us me included for allowing our kehilla to sink so low. this is not behavior indicitative of a ir hatorah its behavior of an ir hasheker
Why are there male menahel in a girls high school? Commenting on girls bodies is called Chinuch Al Taharas Hakoidesh? What's wrong with this picture?
In addition,
Piha Pascha b'chochmah, v'Toras chessed al lishonah.
This should be the motto of any true bas yisroel.
10:29 a.m. said it all! No need for further discussion.
Let me just say that what goes on in this town is a massive chilul hashem,more so then what happened last month scandals when are the so call mosdos going to wake up and realize they are going to burn you are messing with our precious yiddisha girls .you know what rejection does do these kids? then the same jerks ask.. how did this happen? how many rosh yeshivath came from s called "MODERN HOMES' or for that matter non frum homes and turned out to be our gedolim including one of our local rosh yeshiva what if he was rejected1! wake up people LoVE THY NEIGHBOR .this is HASHEMS will he will take care of your children not your stupid narrow mindness and evil to your fellow yid by the way my kids have always been accepted but this eats me up when i see kids going off the derech when it could have been avoided what a crime and shame on all of you who are responsible HAVE A GOOD YEAR
Hey Lakewood Scoop - taking a nap?
It is Elul, let's not make any mean or hurtful comments
Thanks
Don't insult me just because I want what is best for my child. Oros is the in place and if your daughter doesn't have what it takes just be accepting and move on. How babyish to say. I wouldnt want to play with you anyway.
Let me get this straight. My choices were a school where the menahel abuses the girls mentally or on that excludes anyone that is not a book smart genius. And I should feel bad sending my daughter away out of town?she will be a lot better off there
To the mother who wants her child in the school for the academically superior...I am being dan l'kaf zechus and assuming that you are being facetious. You must be trying to prove an important point by making yourself sound impossibly elitist. I'm sure that you don't ACTUALLY feel that way. But in case you do, I want to ask you (and others like you) an interesting question. What do you think your feelings would be if your academically superior, super bright, very motivated to learn all she can before she gets married, daughter would have a younger sister who is a nice fine girl who happens to be a mediocre student. I guess you wouldn't want Oros to accept her because it wouldn't be right or fair to all those super bright girls. Or maybe you would change your tune 'cause the "mediocre" girl in this case happens to be your daughter. And that makes her not mediocre at all. In fact, it makes her special. About as special as these other "mediocre" appearing girls. So the solution is simple. Stop viewing these bnos yisroel as someone else's problem, and start looking at it as your problem. Maybe in that zechus, you can save yourself a problem of your own one day.
11:32,
What you want is NOT the best for your child. The best for your child is to know HaShem.
Yirmiyah (9:23), Only in this shall the praiser praise, contemplating and knowing Me, for I HaShem do CHESSED, MISHPAT, and TZEDACKA in the land, because these I have desired, says HaShem (see Yirmiya 9:23).
I should have quoted more.
Yirmiya (9:22), "So says Hashem, the wise should not praise himself in wisdom nor the strong praise himself in strength nor the rich praise himself in wealth."
Yirmiya(9:23), "Only in this shall the praiser praise, contemplating and knowing Me, for I HaShem do CHESSED, MISHPAT, and TZEDACKA in the land, because these I have desired, says HaShem."
I would be realistic if I chas vshalom had a dughter that was not up to par with the normal girls in this town. I don't yet so I will worry about it if it ever comes up. I wouldn't expect someone to let me in to a school with high academic standards if my child can't handle it any more than a school would take a retarded child that belongs in schi into a regular school
If all the parents that have problematic daughters did what they were told. And did not threaten the people that were trying to help them this whole situation could have been avoided. Nobody promised anyone a definite acceptance for their daughter. Maybe we were not at the same meeting. The mashgiach said nothing about guaranteed acceptance. We tried to help you people. Next year you will be on your own.
last two comments say it all Hashem rules! not the rosh mosdos of lakewood and to think one of the schools was started "lezachar neshmas"
Imagine if this would leak out to the secular media they would have a field day with this! and rightfuly so1 what is with you lakewood people stand up for what is right
I dont know what field day anybody would have . what I see is a town that gets no funding for its schools and has 3 times as many kids as the public school system ,still somehow being able to place 99% of its kids into schools funded solely by private volunteers and partial tutitions .
I think it is an amazing feat.
Why are we focusing on the 1 half of 1 per cent problems . Why dont we focus on the Tzadikim that have made schools for the 99.5 % that were accepted
i will tell you why we focus on 1 half of one percent because if it was your child who was rejected then it would be 1000000 percent your problem what a selfish comment you make. isnt even ONE girl that potentialy can get ruined enough for the " HOLIER THAN THOUGH"a reason to change things in your foresaken town
The public schools spend about 120 million of taxpayer money to do a mediocre job of educating about 5000 children . Our community spends about 50 to 60 million of PRIVATE MONEY doing a very good job of educating about 15,000 children .
I think that is something to be proud of .
I think everybody who helps run a Moisad should be considered very special .
Anon 1:07
let your child be the 1 half of 1% Then Talk. Until then keep your negative comments to your self.
mr 1;17
Nobody said not to deal with the problems even if it was one child .
The writer just stated his amazement of all the positive things being done by volunteers in town . Regardless of the problems that need to be rectified ,there is still much to be proud of .
to MY
you are the one making negative comments . Just because you are hurt should not prevent everybody from seeing the massive positive asccomplishments of the volunteers who provide for the education of 15,000 students . We all agree there are problems that need to be rectified and people hurt ,but that does not take away from all the massive good being done .
I agree .
Never in the history of Klal Yisroel have so many children been educated so well without any organized Vaad Hair . We rely solely on volunteers who create schools and their main Schar is being called Reshoim and all kinds of names by the people commenting here .
117 thank you i know you mean well but the "velt" is stating to realize that lakewood has its issues and its in denial about all the kids at risk they are producing and blame everything on tznius how bout "sinus chenom'
Volunteers.
Volunteers don't get paid. Teachers don't volunteer they get paid (probably more than what I get paid). administraters get paid not volunteer.
Hatzalah members volunteer. Parents that help out for fund raisers volunteer.
Get your facts straight before you post anything, don't just type.
As long as 1 single child who want to go to school & learn is left out everything that was done is for nothing.
NO CHILD SHOULD BE LEFT OUT.
I think most outsiders would be amazed ( in a positive way ) that in a town like Lakewood where every year there are an additional hundreds and hundreds of children entering both elementary and high school ,that we only have 10 kids out of school as of today .
We must sympathize with those 10 parents (assuming they are not at fault ) and we must try to help them . But it should not let us take the focus off all the good people who provide for Lakewoods students .
1:39 pm
I happen to know that many of the people who started the schools do not get paid . Unless you call signing personally for loans as payment .
It is the responsibility of the COMMUNITY ( including yourself ) to fund the schools for expansion so that No CHILD is left out . why is it the responsibility of somebody who is already providing dor the schooling of 200 or 300 kids ,to provide for everybody .
You are just putting the blame for your inactiion on other people who have actuall done something .
THERE ARE NO EXCUSES NOT TO ACCEPT NORMAL CHILDREN THAT WANT A TORAH EDUCATION EVEN IF THE FATHER PASSED A BAD CHECK FOR 25 MILLION THAT WAS REB YAAKOVS AND REB MOSHES PHILOSOPHY I KNOW !
Administrators and Teachers get paid to teach the amount of students their schools have capacity for . They DO NOT get paid to become full time schnorrers to run around the Country to collect money to keep expanding their school every year so people can move from Ny to get cheaper housing in Lakewood . Evert person moving from NY costs every school about 10,000 just in infrastructure costs to build new buildings and classromms ( besides the deficit when most dont pay full tution ) Its ironic that these sa,e people who expect the free lunch are the biggest complainers and call the scgools Reshoim
If everybody who moved from NY for cheaper housing would be required to put 10,000 per child into an Education fund to build new schools ,then they would have a right to complain . But if there was such a fund ,we wouldnt have problems placing kids .
You are just not getting it. There are girls from families that are not problem kids not problem families they did not get in because they are a first girl going into a high school and are b students nothing worse than that. They are from families that are living in lakewood thirty years. Their father learnt in kollel,supported all the moisdos.many are from well known families that if they made a wedding would get their photos in the scoop. They Helped the tzibur and were turned away as if no one owes them anything. And now what? You want them to open a school ?No good can. Come of this for any of the moisdos in this town. We need a set of rules as to how and when acceptance letters are sent out.what criteria a school must use for rejection and how those girls should be dealt with caution. And respect
I happen to know a situation where a fine family didnt have funds for tuition and used that as a excuse not to acept .till someone stepped up to the plate with 5000 cash and guarenteed the other 3 years ,then the school found tznius issues on the mother. today this girl is off the derech! way to go lakewood!
to the last commentor of "you just dont get it' thank you for putting things in perfect perspective
Everybody knows that if we had an abundance of high schools ,there would be no problem. Supply and demand dictates that . Look at the Boys mesivtas . Because so many people want to be marbitzei Torah ,there is such an abundance of mesivtas that the Menahalim are practically begging people vto send their kids .Since there is no kovod or Sipuk of Harbotzas Hatorah in girls schools ,nobody wants to make them . They also lose lots of money due to the low tuitions in Lakewood. Gvirim are also not interested in donating to girls schools . They give all their money to Boys schools where its Torah .
If everybody would give money to make the same amount of girls high schools like we have mesivtas in Town ,then we would have every student placed immediately
There is also 15 boy`s high schools which dont have more then 15 bachurim and there are 6 new ones opening up
SUPPLY and Demand is the Key , Create the supply and you will have no more problems .
to 1:54 pm
You just proved the point . The girls who do not get in are first time high schoolers. This means that after the schools take their siblings there is a small shortage of seats . Ket the community create more seats and your problem goes away . I guarantee you that if schhols only had 15 kids to fill 25 seats in a class ,they would beg parents to send their kids ,no matter how weak they are .
Right now they have 40 applicants to fill those 25 seats .
Anonymous said...
Administrators and Teachers get paid to teach the amount of students their schools have capacity for . They DO NOT get paid to become full time schnorrers to run around the Country to collect money to keep expanding their school every year so people can move from Ny to get cheaper housing in Lakewood . Evert person moving from NY costs every school about 10,000 just in infrastructure costs to build new buildings and classromms ( besides the deficit when most dont pay full tution ) Its ironic that these sa,e people who expect the free lunch are the biggest complainers and call the scgools Reshoim
August 23, 2009 1:50 PM
================================
ABOUT 90 PERCENT OF BMG BOCHURIM ARE FROM THE NY AREA . aRE YOU GOING TO TELL THEM TO LEAVE BECAUSE THEY ARE PUTTING A STRAIN ON THE SYTEM? I BET YOUR SCHOOL SHNORS FROM NY PEOPLE TOO SO DONT BE THROWING ROCKS AT GLASS HOMES AND DONT BITE THE HAND WHICH FEEDS YOU!
tHE BRISKER RAV ONCE SAID THAT A NEBACH APIKORES IS STILL AN APIKORES. MY COMMENT IS THAT A NEBACH RASHA IS STILL A RASHA .
If we created ONE new Girls High school for evey FIVE new mesivtas we would be OK .
I heard of somebody that went to a gvir who gave thousands to a new Mesivta with 8 bochurim . When he told him he wants money for a Girls school he gave him 2 times chai .
There is your answer why we have these problems .
The only NEBACh RASHA I see here is the one not doing something to make schools for the Klal and then saying " I am a nebach , I cant or I dont have money , "
In my opinion the guys who made schools and are full did their share . I am mekane their Schar ,especially in light of all the Bizyonos they get .
To all the menahalim on here that are volunteering for the klal. Just note there are many types of volunteers hatzolah chevra kadisha etc. They all receive training and do not just take anyone in their ranks. I don't think any of you jokers would last a day on hatzolah with your exclusionary attitude. People would die. And now that you are volunteering in chinnuch you are slowly killing our children so whuy don't you turn over the keys to some compassionate intelligent people with ahavas yisroel in their blood and stop. Pretending you know what you are doing.people are getting hurt
Supply and demand in Lakewood has proven itself . A few years ago it was hard for some boys to find Mesivtas . Then started the new trend of every other Yungerman to start a Mesivta and Voila . The weakest Bochurim are getting dozens of calls ,pleading with their fathers to please send them to my Mesivta . Open up more Girls High schools and the same will happen . The town has nobody to blame but itself . If there is money for 100 restaurants and many Lexuses and mansions ,but we cant fund the construction of new schools ,then dont blame anybody else but yourselves
i for one went thru gehonim 4 years ago and since move away from lakewood mainly because my wife refused to have more chidren at the risk of going thru this gehonim 4 years later i see nothing has changed only the victims
Funny I just bh did a shidduch for my daughter they only wanted to know if she turns heads when she waks by and how much money I will give fo support. The subject of her high school grades never came up. This whole thing is ridiculously funny
to anon 2:35
You complain that all the menahalim are incompetent . Who is stopping " Compassionate and intelligent people with Ahavas Yisroel in their blood " from becoming Menahalim and opening up schools ?
Isnt it interesting that according to you ,every menahel of a school is incompetent and a bad person ?
I hope that on Yom Kippur, all the exclusionary people do not say Kol Nidrei, because it says there that we need to daven together with the avaryonim.
Kal vchomher ben beno shel kal vachomer that grade b students must be included.
We must be inclusive. Turn away your brother and sister and HaShem will turn you away.
Dear obvious blogging menahel. You are right there are many wonderful menahalim that are doing their best to help people. But there are a few that treat people badly and give the group a bad name. Unfortunately these people mistreat people and nobody penalizes them for their actions. The true oiskai tzorchei tzibur beemunah get treated like chattle and are spoken of disparagingly by these uncooth obnoxious impostors the ones who run their schools with compassion and varmkeit are made to feel that their schools are inferior and need to beg people to come and end up with parents that don't want to pay tuition or those that don't take a concern in their children. They feel they are doing the school afavor by attending. All the while the schools that exclude others are rewarded. I would open a school but would have a hard time being the mean obnoxious person needed to be successful in this town. Things need to change. Maybe we needt o have a town meeting with all menahalim and find a solution instead of asking some askonim to help us.
Its so interesting that all the complainers about exclusion ,conveniently forget about dealing with the fact that all the problems stem from lack of space . The complainers are equally guilty for not helping with building more schools . We see that by high school boys as soon as more mesivtas opened ,all of a sudden there is no more exclusion . So its not exclusion for exclusions sake . Its just a plain lack of space. Yes face the facts if there 100 seats for 110 kids ,the smarter ones will get in first . But if there were 120 seats for 110 kids ,EVERYBODY will get in .
The only thing that needs to change is that we as a Community need to take our responsibility to fund and create schools ,as strongly as the goyim take their responsibility to tax themselves ( and us included ) for public school education . There is enough money out there . We just dont care enough and leave it up to a few individuals to do our job for us and then repay them by calling them all kinds of names .
If not having enough schools mattered to us as much as finding a good doctor when needed in timew of illness rch"l or our other needs ,then we would find the time and money to organize a fund to support our schools . Until we do that ,nobody has a right to complain .
i dont want to hear there is no room where there is a will there is a way ur not talking to morons
hypocrisy and inconsistency thats what we have in lakewood
I must say that I, for one, very much appreciate the vaad. They are doing all they can, and with HaShem's help, they will get every last child into a school.
If, in the end, every last child gets in, we will owe them a large debt of gratitude.
The issue is not with the va'ad.
The issue is with this hurtful system of very fine bnos melech being treated in a rejectionary way.
Even so called problem situations should be dealt with respect and a forward looking attitude of how best they can be imbued with the heiligeh hashkofos haTorah.
Aderaba, these are the prize situations of merit, which HaShem loves more than anything else.
No matter what the schools do, they will always have b students and problem children, if not the ones they excluded, then from their ranks of the so called elite.
You can't make cheshbonos with HaShem. There is only one method that works in HaShem's book, and that is called leshem shomayim. Any cheshbonos that work bderech hateva but not bderech shomayim, will only lead to inner rot and failure. Unfortunately, so many people don't get this.
I am totally shocked by a comment made by 3:46 p.m., who seems to be in the school's camp.
Unwilligly, Reb or Mrs. 3:46, you have given yourself away as to how off the mark and elitist you are.
You said that because of lack of space, obviously, the smarter girls will get in first.
Is a smart girl, in your book, more important than a girl with yiras shomayim?
OY VAVOY OY VAVOY OY VAVOY!
Do you say aishes chayil? Isha yiras HaShem hi tishalal.
Come on Stop nitpicking . Smarter doesnt necessarily mean SMARTER Its just a connotation for better midos ,yiras shomayim ,marks etc . Whatever makes a girl stand out .
We dont live in a dream world . as long as there is not enough space ,of course the girls with more midos ,yiras shomayim ,bettermarks ,whatever you want to call it ,will be picked first for the few available places . The rishus here is that the girls are competing for too few slots . If there were enough slots there wouldnt be a need to compete
ask them to walk you into the classrooms im sure you will find room i challenged 2 schools to this last year after school started they denied me. they deny beause "your not good for business'
I may have misjudged you, and I appologise.
But although the fact you make is true, the fact is that girls with better marks (or siblings) are being accepted first, before girls with yiras shomayim. This in itself is a problem.
I know of girls that were taken away by the nazis were not asked if they went to bjj hashem sends a churban to every generation that loses sight of what their tafkid on this earth is. If we forget we may be reminded in a very bad way.
Not true not true not true
The best girk
Ls could not have been chosen first. I know for a fact becaus e my daughter still has not received an acceptance letter and all her report cards have praises written by all her teachers about what asweet intelligent girl she is and how it was an honor to teach her. So either the teachers are lying or the schools are messed up
Boy Im glad I dont run a school in Lakewood .I guess whatever a school does in Lakewood is doomed . If they dont take siblings they are called Reshoim for that . If they take weaker siblings ahead of stronger non siblings ,they are condemmed for that ( see anon 4:53 comment ). I guess the only fine people in town are the ones who dont make schools .
The schools in the end are taking everybody anyway. So why hurt so many people in the process. Just figure it out first and then send the acceptance letters.
I dont know if this is true or not but I heard from somebody that a big part of the problem is that people who got accepted to one school or another only want to go someplace else . So nobody can finish till these 'feinshmekers "
decide what to do .
It doesnt make sense but who knows
To Anon 5:30,
You Said: The schools in the end are taking everybody anyway. So why hurt so many people in the process
Who was hurt were all those girls that have to spend the whole summer wondering why they didn't get accepted & all there friends, who sometimes are not as smart as them, get accepted to more than 1 school.
Than You Said: Just figure it out first and then send the acceptance letters.
I agree with you 1000%, but acceptance letters went out before school even ended.
These poor girls have do wait all summer and until schools finaly open up (I hope they don't open up until ALL girls get in, even if it takes till CHANUKAH).
As a very small partial solution, in case they can't find a way to get it all together, schools can accept a certain percentage and another (nice) percentage should be acceptance letters to everyone for a number of slots on a first come first served basis. This way, those that weren't zariz can only blame themselves.
A better solution is that the schools get together beforehand and deal with all the girls in the most productive way and then send out acceptance letters.
All the gehenom from what they percieve to benefit from the way they do it now is not worth it.
To all you "Eitzesgeibers " . I am sure there is a need for people to actually do something besides blogging . Why dont you call the Vaad and ask them how you can help create a new school . I am sure they will help guide you through the process .
I have a girl which graduated from hs, but she is not an A student.She is frum, tzuniuszik, fine middos, except she is not an A student.
When I applied to seminary, the answer was no. It took me a while to find the reason, but they admit, they like only the top students.So at least I tell my daughterI can not afford it and when it comes to shiduchim, it's not which sem you went, but other Maalos she has ,and that is what counts.
What do people do in my situation? I am sure some of you has gone thru it.
anon 10:41 what type of buiness women are you! just wanted to know.
There are many very capable yungeleit who need parnasah and would be willing to start and run schools . They just need funding . If you fund them they will run the school and follow your rules to accept every child and leave nobody behind . Why dont a group of Askanim get together and fund it so this problem wont keep recurring .
i know a sweet girl in Fakewood that was not accepted till chanukah. and then it was too late. now people look at her and say "nebach' the same hypocrits that rejected her to begin with hashem yerachaim and shame on all responsible
My guess is that if every parent paid between 5,000 and 6,000 in tuition ,then you could probably break even after a few years and wouldnt need so much funding .
That would have to be the average,including those with scholarships .
If 100 parents each contributed 2,000 per year for the first few years ,you could probably fund a school that would accept everybody ,provided the students paid a decent tutition .
Is that such a big price to pay to prevent all this agmas nefesh ?
Why arent people picking up the phone to call the VAAD to volunteer ?
I really dont understand it .
I cant imagine there are not 100 parents in Lakewood who have the Maaser money to do this .
My dog dresses tzniusdik and still didn’t get in to a school?....
To anon 7:31
as much as this blog has a lot of garbage sent to it, it is a very important subject & by you putting in your comment was not called for.
To the one who ssaid there are many capable yungerleit that need a parnosah. That is exactly what we don't need. More closed minded. Untrained yeshivaleit running our schools. We need torah umesorah trained capble personable caring people that can run a school. Announcements for the job opening and for that of a menaheles will iy"h be posted. On this site and in all the major publications. This school will be opened on a large scale. And if some of the newer schools become unattended because of it so be it.
Thank you tls for bringing up such an important topic and helping to reveal all the hypocrisy and unfairness that occurs in our town. It is a very special place and as the people strive for greatness in following hashems ways help them realize some of the najor points they have overlooked. Ahavas yisroel. Anava. Ahavta lreocha kimocha et al. May we all be zoicha to reach a higher level together without sinas chinom becoming our stumbling block and may we use the yerida of this subject as a point to make an aliya to a higher level of hiskarvus to hakodosh boruch hu.
To 8:32 I speak for many people when I say I really hope you are serious about opening a real girls high school based on torah umesorah values. Not some shoot from the hip "I have a good name so I am a mechaneches attitude" we hope we can be a part of the board to decide how it is set up and have another option other than one school run by a man that insults girls about tthe way they look or another that prides itself on pretending to take only the smartest girls because it is paranoid that the girls they were forced to take the first year they opened were not from the brightest bulbs in the box.
your derogatory comment about the not so smart girls gives you away as someone who is just havin g a good time at others expense
I wish it were true . But schools are usyally not built by annponymous internet bloggers . It sounds like a lot of hot air to me
Please please please
I promise hashem has no nachas from any of this. Besides, most of you have no idea what your talking about. Please believe me!!!!!!
sometimes it takes a little hot air to defrost the ice cold attitude of all you uncaring school administrators.treat people with the same respect you would like to get.be the change you wish to see in others.from all the posts i have seen on here today it seems you are all worried that the investment that you have made into trying to grow a viable girls high school based on excluding people to compete with the established schools, is not going to work.try getting a good reputation by actually helping ALL the girls that want to come to your school whether they are A or B students.treat people with honesty and dont expect people to speak kindly of you just because you are "DOING THIS LSHAIM SHOMAYIM"you are fooling yourself into believing this is lshmah.but you are not fooling us.you are no more lshma than a butcher or a soifer.you can say that you are providing a needed service,but ultimately you would like to see a parnassah from it. and that is why you focus on creating a facade of exclusivity to ensure the future of your school.so please dont insult me and tell me i am full of hot air.ihave also done much for our community but i dont go around telling you that i need your help or expect any kovod for it.i never get praise for all the good i do ,nor do i want any,but i do expect to be treated with a shred of dignity from the community i have worked hard to help,and not be told after 20 years in lakewood that i should open a girls school because i have a daughter that needs to go to high school.i just keep getting more and more dissapointed in all of those i have looked up to in the past.i remain anonymous only out of respect for my wife,but i am sure you know who i am.and yes there are big changes on the way whooooooooosh
To all the people that decided that my daughter is a problem child because I want to send her out of town:
No, she's not a problem child; she's just a bit more "colorful" than the run of the mill Lakewood cookie cutter girl with a 'bump' hairstyle. She actually has excellent middos, helps out in the house, averages 90% on tests, etc..
But to be abused by the schools principals these days I know will be a bid turn off for her and I think out of town they are more focused toward each student having hatzlachah than how their school is perceived by the rest of the world.
Let's see: my neighbors daughter was hounded for having her shirt untucked on Sundays, now if she covers her knees it's a big chiddush.
Not all kids who go out of town are 'problem kids,' some just need more space & less pressure to bloom to their fullest potential.
How come sending a boy away to an out of town yeshiva at the young age of 13 is the norm, but if we choose to send our daughter away because we want her to fulfill her potential elsewhere, she is labeled a problem child?
If there was a school that we felt was not so pressurized for our less than A average girl, I am sure more people would jump to it, and it would be the sought after HS, NOT the "reject" school, because not every girl is cut out for that type of pressure.
Things are only going to get worse here before they get better, because there are more and more girls every year graduating.
Who said she is a problem . You are to be commended for your realism and dcedication to your daughter . If more people were like you ,this problem would go away because there would be enough space for those that stay . I am sure there are many kids not cut out for the Lakewood schools who would do better somewhere else ,but parents are not so thought out and it doesnt "pas " for them to do whats right .
Botton Line . When is the Torah Umesorah school starting . If this is for real please identify yourself so people can help .
I agree with anon 9:08 am
There are dozens of out of town mesivtas because everybody understands that all kids are different and need different types of chinuch . Many boys are not cut out for the Lakewood mesivtas ,especially the stricter ones.
With girls ,all of a sudden ,every father thinks his daughter is cut out for the strictest school with the strongest learning program .
I realize that its not as easy to send girls out of town as boys ,but still there must be dozens of girls who really should be given a chance to flourish elsewhere without the pressure of our strict in town schools ;08
Every father does not think his daughter is cut out for the strictest school. The problem is that it's hard to get into any school in Lakewood.
Supply and demand
Not all the schools expect the girls to learn more than the boys. There are some established schools that have realistic goals for the girls and none of the male menahalim interact daily nor comment on the girls looks. We needed more schools like those.
Cmon people. Less than 200 comments on such an important issue?
I thought the Lakewood High schools have female Menahalos ,except maybe for the business office .
I grew up secular. To me this exclusionary attitude is totally chukas ha-goyim. In fact, it is so much like the fraternity/sorority system in colleges (social clubs where people are chosen because they are just like the people already in the club or have the right amount of money or whatever else) is scary. And do you know what that club system is called: the Greek system.
Why not just have a lottery? You put your name in with the amount of tuition you can pay and you get assigned to a school. Girls would learn a lot more of value (ahavas yisrael, achdus, etc.) by being exposed to every kind of Jewish neshama in Lakewood than they do from anything else, I'd bet.
To glowing flower
A lottery system would be great if there was a publicly community financed school .
Being that there is not , I dont think it is realistic to expect people to open their own schools with aLL THE FINANCIAL PRESSURE ON THEIR SHOULDERS ,WITHOUT THEM HAVING AN INPUT into the type of Hasjkofah and .
It is impossible to preach a certain type of Haskofah and at the same time have half the class come from homes that do not suscribe to that in their own personal lifestyle .
Just like we understand that Chasidishe schools expect children to come from homes where the mother wear seams of a certain thickness or certain type of headcovering , so too our private schools ,which are for the most part finabced by the owners and the parent body ,is entitled to want to have those types of students that their families are in conformance with what is taught in their sdchools . Some schools frown on TVs other on DVD and videos ,other care about the modes of the mothers dress ,so as it not conflicting with what is taught and so on .
Once you have a truly publicly funded school ,then everybody would agree ,a lottery system would be the way .
Anon@3:57
Guess you thought wrong!!
anon@4:46
I have cousins in 2 of the existing schools and to the best of my knowledge there are no male Menahalim in either . Where are you getting your information from ?
some have men that are in constant contact with the girls and have been known to comment to them on their dress and looks.very creepy if you ask me
btw chassidishe schools accept everyone.i know of one girl that had children with a goy and got back on the derech and her children were taken in no problem.but our holy town wont accept a kid because they know his parents met without a shidduch dateand got married.well guess what.they had a child and now she needs a school.pathetic
yes a rabbi that runs one school told my daughter her hair is too long
i was asked with my wife if our daughter had tznius issues at the interview.he just saw her .she was 13 .i asked what girl that age could have issues and he leered and said "oh you would be surprised".maybe if she had tznius issues we would have gotten in.i heard too many creepy stories to allow my daughter to go there
is school starting on time or not? we will plan a vacation.i hope they tell us soon,tickets are cheap now
The askanim and the principals knew this was coming. They had since Feb. to make their decisions, and then once they did in June, they SHOULD NOT have sent out acceptance letters until everyone was placed. Why make a few suffer through the whole summer if it was going to come to this anyway?!
Anonymous 4:37, it goes without saying that the girl and her family would have to abide by the school rules of each school she was entering the lottery to attend.
Just because it's not a publically funded school system doesn't mean the education of our girls isn't a public responsibility. Your argument against a lottery just doesn't hold water.
And BTW, where I live also has requirements that parents adhere to certain rules of dress, no TV etc. And I know way too many who sign the form saying "Yes, no TV. Yes, no Internet access." And it's a total lie. I would imagine that is the case in Lakewood. How ridiculous is it that a school is in a position of accepting a girl whose family has Internet in secret and rejecting a girl whose family has a dog in public...
I thought there was a Takanah in Lakewood to have only lady menaheles in girls schools ?
I thought there was a Takanah in Lakewood to have only lady menaheles in girls schools ?
So what do you do with those that dont abide by those rules ? send them out of Lakewood ?
Most schools that I know would not want someone from a house where the mother goes publicly with a snood that exposes some of her hair . Yet there are definitely those mothers that have no problems with that . This is just one example . Each school can have its own limits of tolerance ,but the bottom line is that there are definitely a growing number of Lakewood families that might not conform to most schools ideals in every way .
yet there is an outcry of NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND . How do you reconcile that with the schools right to not take girls from dsuch families ?
am I number 200 ?
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